Understanding, Preventing & Healing the Wounds from Childhood Sexual Assault.

HI Kathy, Thank you for your support. It does ha...

2010-04-24T14:23:14.944-07:00

HI Kathy,

Thank you for your support. It does happen way too often. I have just created a television talk show called "Voice Finder, CSA", it's set to start running on May 12th.

And yes, it could happen to any child. All an abuser needs is an opportunity.

I am so happy to hear that you do understand and try and help.

I am doing my best to teach me how to be a better speaker so that I can reach out and help the children and those who need to heal.

My Dad will be in will be on one of my shows telling how parents can help.

Kathy, I would love your feedback on my series. Here are the links to the first show.
http://www.youtubVersion A Part 1 -
e.com/watch?v=509wRsbxlB8
Part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lYf-oZQPmJE
Thank you again for your support. I do need it. What I am doing now is very exposing but I think it needs to be done.
Cheers,
Renee

Dear Renee: I am very must behind you. I have ta...

2010-04-19T20:42:00.930-07:00

Dear Renee:

I am very must behind you. I have taught and continue to teach many children who like you have been sexually assaulted by family, friends, strangers.... It saddens my heart. Perhaps a good title could be "It Could Happen to You Too".

Keep up the healing and know that our family is behind you 100%.
Kathy Robinson

Hi Karen, Thanks for watching. Yes, I just reali...

2010-03-25T17:36:12.802-07:00

Hi Karen,

Thanks for watching. Yes, I just realized I am having a problem with these links. I am new to computers too. And I don't think like programmers. haha I'll work it out.
If you want to contact me directly, my email is "StoryRose1@aol.com". You shouldn't have any trouble connecting to me.
And I will try and get these links to be live.
Thanks for sharing and caring.
Cheers,
Renee

Hi Renee Well done on the videos Keep up with the ...

2010-03-25T17:10:33.461-07:00

Hi Renee
Well done on the videos
Keep up with the good work
I am having trouble connecting with you?

Have a lovely evening
love Karen

Hope, you are funny. lol I will try and see what ...

2010-03-23T20:42:17.011-07:00

Hope, you are funny. lol
I will try and see what I mixed up, without flushing. haha
Cheers,
Renee

Hope says: to view the youtube I copied and pasted...

2010-03-23T20:36:46.163-07:00

Hope says: to view the youtube I copied and pasted the youtube address to youtube home page. I had to remove the http://www stuff for youtube to search. your videos came right up. You sould youtube from the a different location. If we want a voice we shouldn't be found hiding in a toilet to video. HaHa. I thought there was humor in that statement. Stay strong as always.

You are wonderful HOPE! I haven't figured out ...

2010-03-23T18:42:17.679-07:00

You are wonderful HOPE!
I haven't figured out yet how to see how many views. Now I know there is a way. My Dad will be tickled. I am just kind of winging it. But you got to see it. Yea!
Please help me get better. I know I can use lots of work to get my self heard. And Hope you are one of my best inspirations. Please keep with me and help me grow.
We will be heard. The more honest talk the better. I am proud of you.
Love,
Renee

HOPE says: 34 views and counting on youtube. And p...

2010-03-23T18:36:25.267-07:00

HOPE says: 34 views and counting on youtube. And papa has 39. I watched the videos. My family, dad included, have been talking about predators with our children. I recently heard that the program "Stranger Danger" left an entire generation of young people looking for a trenchcoat bad guy---we now know it is the bad guy next door who we should watch out for. I am recoverying from a rape which occured in my home while my boys were alsleep. We recently had a situation where my 9 and 6 year old did not remember who they were allowed to come home with from school. They made a serious error. Thankfully the school called. More talk, more talk, more talk is needed even from hypervigilent me. Havent figured out how to post a view except by using anonymous-take care, HOPE

Hi Vicki, Thank you, yes I am going to do another...

2010-03-22T07:35:44.464-07:00

Hi Vicki,

Thank you, yes I am going to do another video or two with my Dad having a heart to heart discussing the issue from my Dad's direction.
Actually, I was going to do the first solo. Then my Dad started helping with the camera and off camera comments. Finally, I decided to have my Dad on screen with me. And I shot it. So it was a bit improv.
It is my first attempt, I should improve. I am working on it. I just made another video with only me. I think I did better talking the camera. I imagined the camera was one of my beautiful sweet nieces.
Thanks for the encouragement and and guidance. Your comments are right on target. I should have a new one with my Dad sometime this week.
Please stay tuned and keep guiding me. I will improve.
Cheers,
Renee

Great start with the video, I echo two comments, l...

2010-03-21T22:48:48.239-07:00

Great start with the video, I echo two comments, look into the camera more, and engage Dad more. Either do a monologue or have a conversation with him (or both). It's a bit awkward having you talking TO him about this. We assume he knows and that you've dealt with it together, what did he learn? What can he share from the parents perspective?
Great start my BraveHeart Sister, I applaud your courage and your path!
Vicki

Thank you LaughSing, Yes, I do need to look at th...

2010-03-20T19:34:20.622-07:00

Thank you LaughSing,

Yes, I do need to look at the camera. I am not use to that, and I kept trying to look at my Dad. I will get better the next time. Now that I know.
Thanks for the feedback. I need it. lol
Cheers,
Renee

Great job posting the video! I know that takes a ...

2010-03-20T19:30:15.114-07:00

Great job posting the video! I know that takes a lot of courage.

It is scary that it's as common as one in three girls, that makes your message even more important.

The only suggestion I have for improving your future videos is... can you look into the camera a bit more? People tend to believe us more when we look them in the eye.

I wish you all the joy life can bring you. :)

Thank you Anonymous, It is a process and I am lear...

2010-03-20T07:14:23.191-07:00

Thank you Anonymous,
It is a process and I am learning to make my own path. No one wants to believe it is a common as it is, one in three girls. I am doing my best to show ugly unspoken truth. And offering the solutions I needed as a child. I am trying to scare parents so the will be better prepared and help keep their children. It is a much bigger danger to their children.
Stay strong and heal,
Renee

To be brutally honest, I'm not the biggest fan...

2010-03-20T04:33:33.231-07:00

To be brutally honest, I'm not the biggest fan of your blog. You come across so much better on the video and although you were saying the same things as you have in your blog, it didn't seem as though you were trying to scare people as much.
I really liked the video, keep up the good work!

Hope always has a voice here. Always. The truth d...

2010-03-17T16:40:16.646-07:00

Hope always has a voice here. Always.
The truth does set us free. And the truth can't come out in silence. I am breaking mine, you are breaking yours. There is hope.
Stay strong and heal my friend. You are doing great, and are amazingly brave.
I am proud of you.
Cheers,
Renee
Voice Finder

Hope says: I am a statistic. I was abused as child...

2010-03-17T16:21:34.317-07:00

Hope says: I am a statistic. I was abused as child and raped as an adult. I believe with all my heart that the silence I learned as a child silenced me during the rape. I believe ANY woman can be a target. I do believe that he targeted me because he knew I would not tell. I do know now that he went from room to room assuring my boys were asleep. He said so on the stand. He also stated that he "thought about taking us both out" three months after the rape. I was brainwashed by my church to be silent as well. If I said I disagreed I was told that I was questioning authority. And I learned that "love covers a multitude of sin" I had no idea that I had inapropriately applied those scriptures to further my silence. I did not know how to protect myself. I know all the safety tips. Yet,the fact that a 16 year old could commit such a heinous crime in my own home...And to think, my husband I trusted him. I was silent. And daily I am silent as I listen to the parade of lies flaughnted before us...thank you for giving me a voice here. I appreciate it.

Yes, Hope everyone teaches us silence and shame. ...

2010-03-13T17:32:46.862-08:00

Yes, Hope everyone teaches us silence and shame. How can we solve this problem when we don't look at the full ugly truth? We can't.
When I was a child one in three kids were sexually assaulted by someone they know. And today, the same. We need to change this.
And you bring up another major point I have always wondered about. The target of another rapist later on. When we are sexually assaulted young, we almost always have one or more other rapists in our future. Nearly 100% from what I have found so far. I am the only female I have found that was not raped later by another. But I was chased, a lot. What is up with that? Do they zone in on us somehow?
Hope, I know how hard it is to stand up and hold your ground over and over again. But you are doing the right thing. You just keep saying the absolute truth. I believe the truth will set us free and help us heal.
When you need me, please shoot me a private email from my profile on this blog. OK?
Stay strong, loud, and heal my friend.
Cheers,
Renee

Hope says: Renee, Thanks again. Shame is a terribl...

2010-03-12T18:50:00.437-08:00

Hope says: Renee, Thanks again. Shame is a terrible silencer. For all victims of assault. I could only tell small insignificant things...I avoided telling the whole truth even as a child. My childhood abuser called today to offer his assistance. I am angry because he is the one that taught me to be silent. He held my head under water until I quite kicking, he shamed and beat me silence...and when my rapist did the same I lived what I had learned.

Hi Elena, Yes, I am gone from After Silence. Loc...

2010-03-12T08:17:25.791-08:00

Hi Elena,

Yes, I am gone from After Silence. Locked out of my account. They didn't like me sharing my blog. They said I was forcing it on to everyone on the site. We disagreed, and my access has been denied.
But that is alright Elena, I did what I needed on the site. I met other wonderful survivors who share my passion for complete mental health. Survivor who need better solutions to this no good problem of sexual assault.
I tried to share with everyone on the rape site how I got rid of all my shame, and maybe I was over eager. But I am not wrong, it worked. I lost all my shame by going public this blog.
And now I really feel as if I am making huge strides and moving in a positive preventive direction.
The truth of what sexual assault does to us is often hidden. I am not hiding it anymore. I am taking the full truth out in the light and dealing with it directly. And I am glad you are joining me. I will need friends who understand.
If you or any of the other survivors wish to contact me directly and privately, my email is my profile. "StoryRose1@aol.com" And I have opened a "myspace" account Renee B Cooper, myspace.com/reneebcooper. Maybe, I should have named my space "Voice Finders".
Yes, I bid farewell to After Silence. And I wish all be stay strong and heal. We will find a way.
Thank you for the great support. Now, I don't feel so alone on this road. And that really helps me to find my strength and continue.
We will find a better way.
Cheers,
Renee

You've gone from After Silence! What happened?...

2010-03-12T01:00:18.291-08:00

You've gone from After Silence!
What happened? I enjoyed your posts.x

Thank you Anjali, I am doing my best to find my t...

2010-03-10T18:18:39.857-08:00

Thank you Anjali,

I am doing my best to find my true voice and use it purposely. A lot of healing has been happening in this process of breaking all my silence. It has allowed me to lose the shame. What a wonderful thing to dump. I hated feeling shame, it never fit me. And now, I can be free of it. It feels wonderful. So yes, I am healing and making huge stride with the well wishes and encouragement, and a lot of guts.
Thank you for the healing help and letting me share.
Cheers,
Renee

I wish you health, happiness, hugs, and much heali...

2010-03-10T17:49:38.113-08:00

I wish you health, happiness, hugs, and much healing Renee.

You speak for so many.

Hope you are absolutely right. Everyone wants to ...

2010-03-05T18:55:27.806-08:00

Hope you are absolutely right. Everyone wants to silence us. No one really wants to know, too many think if they pretend. It never happened. But it did. It happened for me and for you. And we have every right to speak about it and show the faults of your society.
Sometimes, I think people want to except one in three children sexually assaulted. Because they do nothing to help us, they try and silence us.
And yes, you are right we get the "silence" treatment from all side. The silence and secrecy of sexual assault needs to end.
This blog has done if for me. And I know, Hope that in the end, it will do it for you.
I am proud of you for keeping up the fight and trying more and more to get yourself heard. I know how hard it is. But we must. That is how we will get rapists afraid of us. Haha
Stay strong and heal my friend.
Cheers,
Renee

Hope says: Strange that a rape woman who finds her...

2010-03-05T18:25:23.938-08:00

Hope says: Strange that a rape woman who finds her voice must also contend with societal silencing. I consider societal silencing any act which intimidates women into silence-from the policeman who intonation is accusatory in questioning a rape victim to the cashier who whispers to her coworker when a woman who has suffered an unspeakable crime walks thru. I do not think AS is silencing Renee. But it feels that way because people judge the way we "express" our new voice. That is the make up of societal silencing. We do not like things that make us feel uncomfortable or out of the "norm". Churches silence women, rape crisis silences women, schools, legal systems...But we find a way when we are ready just as this blog has found a way

There is always Hope, Thank you, my friend. We wi...

2010-03-04T17:43:52.665-08:00

There is always Hope, Thank you, my friend.
We will find a better way. We will. And I think we are both beginning to find the way. I am finding mine in this blog and direction. And you are more on the battle ground. The front line. You are doing the right thing, regardless. Because it is the right thing.
Yes, teens rape. And it is against the law, not normal growing. Why do people want to believe that raping is normal? I have no idea Hope, but I know you will find a better result.
Stay strong and heal,
Renee